Taking a chance in mid-life
I’m a lot like Ava Thompson, the protagonist of my forthcoming book, The Steps Between Us, now in pre-order on Amazon. After her sons leave for college, Ava is at a loose end. Casting about for something to do, she discovers a secret world full of people who love ballroom dance – and who show off their skills at Friday night social dance parties. Ava is entranced and desperately wants to be a member of this club.
But she’s torn. Bad experiences with dance as a child left her nervous, even phobic, about trying to learn dance. And that’s how it was with me, too. The book is fiction, but the anecdote about Ava being fired from ballet lessons as a young girl comes straight out of my experience. We both started ballroom with scars. But we both had (still have!) a burning desire to learn and take their place among the elite: People Who Can Dance.
Unfortunately, those scars interfered with our ability to learn dance. Once a panicked, fight-or-flight response takes hold, the brain is focused only on survival. That situation does not lend itself well to learning anything, especially something as difficult as ballroom! Thinking back, now in my eighth year as a ballroom student, I can say I spent years in fight-or-flight mode – during my lessons, at showcases, at competitions, even at social dance parties (I don’t think I will ever be able to do waltz at a social dance – amateur leaders with a modicum of skill simply refuse to stick to the basics.)
The Steps Between Us is, on one level, the story of one dancer’s journey – the self-doubt, embarrassment, and false starts. Ava learns how to make her way in Ballroom World. So have I. And we both still love it.
One thing I have learned in my time here: Everyone wants to dance, and everyone is terrified at the beginning.
Are you contemplating taking a chance of your own? Drop me a line and let me know your plans.
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